I’m a fan of social media. I use it daily. Twitter is what I open instead of the fridge when I’m bored, and it keeps me well informed and entertained–thanks to a carefully curated list of theologians, geeks and friends.

Technology has opened up a world of connections impossible just a few decades (years?) ago. In 1980, if you wanted to tell your friends that someone at Starbucks ordered an outrageous drink, you would have had to call each friend, one by one. Or written a letter. Or waited until you saw them in person. Now, hundreds and thousands of people can see whatever you want to share with them, split seconds after it happens.

Photo courtesy of Death to the Stock Photo

We can instantly respond to anything we experience. An amazing catch. A hilarious sign. A crazy remark. An unbelievable scene.

See it; share it. Click-clack.

That means there’s no time for a filter. Gossip is just a tap away.

At the same time, there is no room for Christians to retreat from new technologies. We go where people are to love them. Influence them. Point them to Jesus.

But sometimes, we do a stupendously sucky job at using social media in a way that honors God and loves people. We use technology to make fun of people. Shame people. Embarrass people.

People. People! People made in the image of God. People who have families. Moms. Dads. Brothers. Sisters. Kids. Parents. People whose butts may be hanging out–whether they know it or not–and probably don’t want to broadcast their cheeks on Reddit or Imgur.

Before we grab our virtual pitchforks and tweet out, “Down with Twitter!” we must realize an abolition on technology is not the solution.

Technology isn’t the problem. Our hearts are. 

The Inspiration

This post has been perculating for a long time. I saw a Christian use social media in a way that broke my heart. I won’t go into the details, so as to not step upon my soapbox and say, “Stop using social media to destroy people!” by launching off with an illustration that (albeit anonymously) destroys someone. If you think it was you that inspired this post, join the club. Almost every human could a be card-carrying, social-media abuser. Just scan through your last few dozen posts and see if you take any shots at someone.

Let’s Imagine

Let’s imagine a scene. A Christian posts something–a picture, story, or video–of a person doing something foolish or looking less than stellar. And then other Christians laugh via comments and likes and favorites and retweets. It’s heartbreaking if we really think about it. But we don’t stop to think about it.

Maybe that woman who did something weird was having a long day. Maybe that guy suffers from some disorder that makes him wonky. Maybe her kids are struggling or she just got fired. The back story is rarely captured when we highlight other people’s lowlights.

Then, sometimes people step in to say, “Hey! That’s not right!” And then a holier-than-thou / righteous indignation / lighten-up-buddy flamewar breaks out. Christian sometimes let people know who we are by our hate.

Humans look silly sometimes. I get it. We all do eventually. But we don’t expect everyone to see us in those embarrassing moments, and we certainly wouldn’t want those moments unknowingly broadcasted for the world to see, forever.

Those awkward, uncomfortable moments when we are–on the exterior–at our worst, are normally reserved for the people who live with us and love us most. People who love us no matter how ridiculous we look in public.

I could provide an analysis of the back and forth he said she said that ensued from this post or that post, but it’s not necessary. You’ve seen it. Maybe you’ve engaged in it. Perhaps you even started it.

Whether we sat back and chuckled or shook our heads and moved on, we’ve all been witnesses. And of course, I’ve played the culprit. I’ve provided commentary on ridiculous things people have done in public or crazy things I’ve overheard, often out of context, and mocked people because of it. I used a platform to shame others and try to make myself look funny, witty or strikingly observant.

The Bottom Line

Here’s the deal: when you post something to social media mocking a person in any medium, it is gossip.

It’s gossip if you don’t know the person. It’s gossip if you do. And just because you don’t know their name doesn’t make it anonymous or harmless.

God knows them. God loves them. Their family knows that man. They love him. Jesus loves the guy with his dirty clothes shopping at Walmart who, according to you, just can’t seem to get his act together.

And Jesus loves us when we are the person who posts pictures with ill-intent or allegedly no intent at all of that man. But Jesus had to die for us because of the sin in our hearts that compels us to dehumanize our fellow humans.

If you’ve done this, repent. Ask for forgiveness. take down the picture or delete the tweet. Some damage has been done, but public repentance is a powerful, God-honoring thing.

Love God. Love your neighbor. And by the grace of God, take a stand and change things.

Fixing This Mess

A simple question could fix this mess before it starts. Ask, Am I loving my neighbor? We can beat around the bush, and rationalize and explain ourselves and say “lighten up!”

But just ask yourself, “Am I loving this guy? Am I loving this woman?”

We laugh at others who hurt. We laugh at their awkward family photos. Their outfits. The way they talk. We make other people look bad so we look good.

Then we curate our profiles. We untag. Unfollow. Unfriend. Yet we post the unfiltered version of other people’s lives.

This isn’t a diatribe against one specific post. It’s a microscopic view of the problem of the human heart. My heart. Your heart. Our hearts.

Social media is a magnifier for what is already in our heart. If your heart is prone to gossip, social media is an outlet.

Stop making excuses. Stop gossiping. Start loving your neighbor.

This isn’t about finding a line between sharing something funny and where gossip begins. The lines are blurred. There’s not a clear cut example, but for me, if it is even close, I want to take a big step backward and love my neighbor instead of sharing their misfortune.

On Confronting Others

One of the diciest parts about calling out other Christians for posting hurtful things on social media is the public forum. I’d encourage a private message instead of a public one. Feel free to rip anything out of this post that would be helpful to share.

Be honest, loving and gracious, even if you think what someone did was wrong. Remind them that person they mocked is loved by God, and that so are they, and that loving your neighbor means loving them even when they don’t know it and not hurting them when they are unaware.

You’ll open yourself up to criticism and rebuke. It’ll be hard, but it is worth it. Love God, love your neighbor, and use social media for His Glory.

Will you choose to love your neighbor?